Relationships
Individual and couples counseling to support your relationship.
Is the ADHD diagnosis you received as a child –or that you suspect you have – getting in the way of your ability to engage in your relationship?
When there is a conflict you often walk away feeling lost and confused. Some of the things you do, cause a lot of fights and you don't understand why. Part of you is angry. That your partner doesn’t understand what you need and then when you protect yourself they get even more hurt and angry.
You aren't sure why you can't be the person they want you to be, no matter how hard you try. It never feels like enough. It can feel like you are both running into a wall over and over.
Your partner says that you shut down and that some of the things that you say are more hurtful than you mean them to be. But it’s annoying that they don’t understand what you are trying to say.
This relationship isn’t something you want to lose.
You have to figure this out. You’re willing to do whatever you can. But you suspect that you both have a secret fear that you can’t give your partner what they need and relationships aren’t for you.
Relationships have always felt bewildering and confusing. They feel like so much work and as though you are giving so much of yourself. You try and try, giving so much, then when you don’t get it right and pull back out of disappointment, your partner's hurt.
It’s so frustrating because you are trying and your partner just doesn’t understand.
Your partner doesn’t understand how hard it is for you to be in a relationship or worse they take it personally. All of the things that come with a relationship can be so irritating. But you do it for them.
Now you worry that you might be losing everything you love.
Your partner says they can’t keep doing this but you are doing the best you can and you don’t know what else to do. You think you are giving them what they want but she often seems upset despite this effort. You’re trying – why can’t your partner see that?
If this is you, you are in the right place.
There is hope and you are taking the right steps to get to where you need to be. I have years of experience helping people understand what is going on in their relationships. We can work on your relationship through individual therapy or through couples therapy.
Hope When Relationships Are Confusing
You don’t need to hide from the demands of your relationship. I will help you get to a place where you don’t need to hide who you are. You aren’t always wrong or doing the wrong thing. It is possible for you to have a successful relationship.
I want to help you get to a place where you don’t need to shut down with your partner. You can understand yourself and what is going on between the two of you.
I want you to feel less bewildered, irritated, and more confident in your wants and needs. Where you and your spouse can problem-solve as equals. You know that you can meet both of your needs and bring your strengths to the relationship as well. Your relationship doesn’t need to feel like it is on the brink anymore.
WHAT WE WILL DO TOGETHER
In Individual’s Therapy
We Will:
Help you get to a place where relationships don’t feel so overwhelming
Identify and understand the needs of both your partner and yourself
Identify your strengths in the relationship
Work on any skills that you might be struggling with
Identify your patterns in intimate relationships
Explore your past and how it’s impacting your interactions with your spouse
Identify when you respond in ways that you don’t feel good about and help you learn to respond in a way that is true to you
Gain confidence in your ability to feel less out of control when it comes to feelings
In Couple’s Therapy
We Will:
Identify any unhealthy patterns that you get stuck in as a couple
Help both partners break out of the Hide-Chase cycle that can be so common
Identify each partner’s needs
Explore each person’s original family dynamics to identify unspoken expectations and beliefs about relationships
Breakdown some of the behaviors that are problematic in your relationship so that they are less emotionally activating